Frequently Asked Questions about Individual and Couples Counselling
Everything you might want to know before the initial consultation, about how sessions work, fees, languages, and what counselling really can and can’t do.
The practical side: process, length, fees, language
How much does couples counselling in Vienna cost?
All prices are transparently listed on the pricing page. The initial consultation is free and lasts 30 minutes. Individual counselling comprises 5 sessions of 60 minutes each, couples counselling 5 sessions of 100 minutes each. If you'd like to continue afterwards, you can extend at any time.
What happens in the free initial consultation?
You'll describe what's on your mind, I'll ask focused questions about your current situation, and by the end of the conversation, you'll know whether working together makes sense for you. No preparation needed. The conversation lasts 30 minutes, takes place online, and is completely non-binding. The login details arrive by email after booking.
Many people say afterwards that it was the first time in a long while they felt truly heard.
Where does the counselling take place?
Online by video call, or in person at the practice in Vienna's 7th district. The initial consultation always takes place online. The exact address is on the contact page.
How long does counselling take altogether?
Individual counselling comprises 5 sessions of 60 minutes each. Couples counselling comprises 5 sessions of 100 minutes each. If you'd like to continue afterwards, you can extend. All details on the pricing page.
In which languages do you offer counselling?
In English, German and Spanish. Languages can also switch within a session, whatever is needed in the moment. More on the multilingual approach.
Can sessions take place in more than one language?
Yes, and that happens more often than you might think. Couples sessions can run in one language, individual sessions in another.
A concrete example: a couple, one partner from Colombia, the other from Germany, has couples sessions in English and individual sessions in Spanish and German respectively. That way, each person speaks in their emotional language. Being able to truly express yourself is what makes deeper work possible.
More on the multilingual approach.
Is counselling at Happy Couples the same as psychotherapy?
No. I'm a qualified life and social counsellor with a focus on intercultural relationship dynamics. The work centres on relationship counselling and clarity coaching, not on clinical psychotherapy. If psychotherapeutic support is what's needed, I'm glad to refer you to qualified colleagues.
More on the counselling approach and about me.
The substance: when counselling helps, and how
Who is intercultural relationship counselling for?
Counselling is for couples whose relationship is shaped by different cultural backgrounds, languages, family expectations or life experiences. Some couples describe their relationship as intercultural, while others use terms such as binational, bicultural, international, multicultural or multilingual.
The label is not what matters. People with the same nationality can have very different cultural backgrounds, while different nationalities do not automatically lead to cultural conflict. The focus is therefore on your particular relationship dynamic, not on which category you fit into.
Individual counselling is also available if you would like to begin working on your relationship on your own.
Can I come to couples counselling on my own?
Yes, that's explicitly possible. Many clients start on their own, and discover that the dynamic in the relationship has already shifted simply through their own changes. Some partners join later.
Does it make sense to come to couples counselling alone, if my partner won't join?
Yes, often more than you'd initially think. The pressure in a relationship is rarely shared equally: one person suffers, the other sees no problem. Whoever is ready to change something can already set a great deal in motion on their own.
I call this self-empowerment: not waiting for your partner, but reclaiming your own capacity to act. What I see again and again in practice: when one person begins to respond differently, the whole dynamic of the relationship often shifts.
What if only one of us wants counselling?
Then that one person starts. Counselling begins with the person who wants to change something, not with the one who refuses.
Forcing a partner into counselling, or using it as a threat, I think nothing of that. It doesn't work, and it creates resistance where openness is needed.
Are we already too late for couples counselling?
That often only becomes clear in conversation. Some couples have more connection than they realise, as long as you can still argue with each other, there's enough substance to work with. Other couples discover in counselling that they actually need separation support, not rescue. Both are possible, both are meaningful.
I stand fully behind good separation counselling. To shape a separation consciously and as adults is a task in its own right, and no one should have to do it alone. What we do together emerges from what's actually there, not from what you were hoping for.
More in the post Stay or leave, a guide for couples.
Why do we keep arguing, even though we love each other?
Because we often have very different ideas about things we take for granted. What does "going on holiday" mean? What does "being a good father" mean? What is "quality time"?
These terms sound universal, but they aren't. Love alone isn't enough. A relationship is also a pragmatic negotiation: what do we actually want? What are our must-haves, what are our deal-breakers? Conflicts are part of it. The question isn't whether they happen, but how skilfully you handle them.
More in the posts Mastering relationship crises and Start your relationship check-up.
Which topics do intercultural couples bring up most often?
Intercultural couples bring the same topics as any couple: sex, children, money, conflict, exhaustion. But two additional themes come up almost every time: homesickness and guilt.
One partner doesn't feel linguistically or culturally at home, sometimes even after years. The other feels responsible for it and tries to compensate, often at the cost of their own needs. An imbalance emerges that's rarely spoken about openly.
More in the posts Power and helplessness in couples and Differentiation-based couples counselling.
How do cultural differences actually affect a relationship?
Cultural differences rarely show up as a big, obvious theme. They show up at Christmas, on the first family visit, with the first child.
Who calls the parents when someone's ill? How often is "often enough" to visit the in-laws? How loud is too loud when you argue, where does disrespect begin? These aren't differences of opinion. They're early imprints no one consciously chose.
Couples who learn to navigate these differences often grow closer than couples without that friction.
More in the posts Living between two family cultures and Shared vision.
Which language should I argue with my partner in?
In the language where you're actually yourself. Whoever can truly express themselves holds the better cards, and that's not a small thing.
In which language do you say "I love you" and mean it? In which language do you really get angry, and in which one do you hide? These aren't side questions. They're core questions. In my sessions, I adapt to my clients' emotional language, English, German or Spanish, sometimes all at once.
More on the multilingual approach.
How can I communicate better with my partner?
Communication in relationships rarely fails because of unwillingness, it fails because of missing tools. The shared dinner turns into a logistics meeting. The planned date into the next to-do. At some point, you only talk about everyday matters, not with each other anymore.
More in the post Go beyond small talk.
What sets Happy Couples' intercultural couples counselling apart from general coaching?
The intercultural focus isn't the backdrop of the counselling, it's the actual subject. Cultural imprints, language barriers and the specific dynamics of international couples sit at the centre of every session.
I work with systemic questioning techniques and a differentiation-based approach following David Schnarch. In concrete terms: we don't dig endlessly in the past. We work in the here and now, within a clearly defined time frame, on concrete next steps.
More in the post Differentiation-based couples counselling and on the method.
What can I do when libido fades in the relationship?
Sexual disconnection is rarely just a physical matter. Especially in intercultural relationships, cultural expectations, unspoken role models and the pressure of managing two worlds at once play a major part. Your own desire goes quiet because everything else is louder.
More in the post Understanding libido problems.
What Happy Couples isn’t
Is Happy Couples the right place for me if I have a mental health condition?
Not necessarily. If you or your partner are going through an acute mental health crisis, psychotherapy is the more suitable place, not relationship counselling. I'll happily refer you to qualified colleagues in such cases.
Relationship counselling is most useful when both partners, despite current strain, feel stable enough to actively engage with the shared process.
Does Happy Couples offer couples therapy in the clinical sense?
No. I'm a life and social counsellor, not a psychotherapist. The distinction is both legal and substantial. What I offer is solution-focused relationship counselling with a clearly structured approach, not an open-ended therapeutic setting.
Can Happy Couples prevent a separation?
That isn't the goal. The goal is clarity: about what you want, what no longer works, and how, together or apart, you take a next step that you both understand. Sometimes the end of a relationship is the best outcome of good counselling.
More in the post Feeling lost in life?
Still have questions?
The free initial consultation is the simplest way to find out whether working together is right for you.